Kennedy NewsA nymphomaniac duck has had his penis removed due to his insatiable appetite for shagging the local birds.
Dave the horny duck found himself in a bit of a pickle: after trying to mate with his female pals 10 times a day, his member became injured and infected.
Antibiotics and painkillers didn’t help nor deter the randy animal. Regretfully, there was only one solution: chopping his dick down to a measly centimetre.
Kennedy NewsAfter enjoying the company of Dora, Freda and Edith too much, Dave’s owner Josh Watson, from Torquay, Devon, says the duck’s genitals became pretty gross.
Josh explained:
The end of his penis had basically died and it was pretty horrific. It looked weird – it was quite worrying. It started not going in and we’d give him a bath to keep it clean but then the tip started going gangrenous and getting infected so that’s when we had to take him into the vet.
The 39-year-old’s prescriptions didn’t allay the duck’s behaviour, so he was soon referred to Highcroft Veterinary Hospital in Bristol. On Thursday, November 28, his penis was surgically removed.
While Dave only has a centimetre left of his ‘unusable’ penis, he can still urinate as ducks only use them for mating.
You can see Dave’s penis pre-surgery below (warning: it’s quite grim):
Kennedy NewsJosh said:
He’s doing fine now, he’s quite resilient for a duck. The only downfall is that he’s lost his willy. I think he feels pretty upset about it. I think he’s a nymphomaniac. He’s got a high sex drive basically. So I think that’s what caused it.
He tries to mate with his female companions a lot. Every chance he can get. I’d say between five and ten times a day, maybe more. It’s not even mating season at the moment and obviously over mating season he gets more of a drive to do it.
He doesn’t stop throughout the year. Over winter he’s meant to calm down. The ducks stop laying eggs but he doesn’t stop mating. He just carries on. I think his female companions do like him. They obviously sometimes get fed up with him and wander off.
Since returning from Bristol, Dave has been separated from his fellow ducks to help him fully recover after his surgery.
Kennedy NewsThe dental service engineer and his partner’s four three-year-old ducks no longer lay as many eggs as they used to and have become pets. They spend their days on the couple’s big lawn and in an enclosure at the top of the garden at night.
Vet Sonya Miles, who operated on Dave, said some ‘overuse and him being far too amorous’ had caused his penis to prolapse before he injured it and it became infected.
The 31-year-old said if they hadn’t removed his penis the infection could have spread elsewhere in his body and put his life at risk.
Kennedy NewsSonya, from Weston-super-Mare, Somerset, said Dave would have been in quite a lot of pain and discomfort if it hadn’t been picked up, and that it’s a common injury among drakes.
Sonya said:
It turns out Dave had been over-amorous with the ladies that he lives with which had caused his penis to prolapse. This resulted in his penis getting traumatised and then pretty infected. He’d basically injured the tip of his penis and had a wound on it that had got infected.
Female ducks can actually be quite aggressive and if they don’t want his attention then they will peck at anything including his penis. I think [his penis] took the brunt of it unfortunately. It’s brutal.
On the face of it he was actually pretty oblivious to the fact that he’d lost his manhood. He was up and about and eating and doing his normal duck things immediately post surgery. But at the end of the day it’s not going to stop him having a completely normal life. It’s not going to bother him too much.
With only a centimetre of a penis left, I’m sure Dave will still have a quack at it.
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After graduating from Glasgow Caledonian University with an NCTJ and BCTJ-accredited Multimedia Journalism degree, Cameron ventured into the world of print journalism at The National, while also working as a freelance film journalist on the side, becoming an accredited Rotten Tomatoes critic in the process. He’s now left his Scottish homelands and took up residence at UNILAD as a journalist.