Bearded Drag Queen Bitten In Balls By Iguana

By :
Christopher Lopez/Facebook

A charming bearded drag queen was just going for an innocent sit-down wee when his testicles were shockingly preyed upon by a massive iguana.

In the city of Hialeah, Florida, Gio Profera has been left terrified of the toilet bowl after what felt like a ‘mouse trap’ on his balls.

The shocking footage shows the massive iguana in the toilet bowl with his whole family screaming around it.

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Here’s a video of the iguana incident, courtesy of @directedbylopez

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Gio told UNILAD:

When I got bitten by the iguana it felt like a mouse trap snapped on my balls. I’m lucky it let go because I can’t imagine the pain of it thrashing around while I’m hanging onto them.

With the bite alone, they were sore for a few days. You cans till faintly see little red holes in the shape of its mouth on my scrotum.

I told the Telemundo reporter he could see my balls, but he didn’t want to. He said that my balls made the story too obscene and that they were more interested in the plumbing issue. They had the whole water company out here.

There’s a certain zen quality to sitting on a toilet. You’re alone, it’s quiet. It’s a change to get lost in your own thoughts. That’s all been lost to me forever. For the rest of my life I’ll be staring at the drain hole through my legs while I’m sitting on the toilet.

What a truly heartbreaking loss for Gio.

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Christopher Lopez, Gio’s friend who caught the fiasco on camera, told UNILAD:

So basically we were hanging out at his house getting ready for some photo shoot stuff when I heard him screaming in the bathroom. It was like a blood curdling scream. We all freaked out, I started filming instinctively because, like, that’s what I do.

He said it felt like a mouse trap going over his balls…Oh my god! Too much.

Just so you know – this happened in Hialeah, which is the most Cuban area of Miami. It’s notorious locally as the place where stuff like this goes down.

But I had no idea when I ran in there I’d see a giant iguana crawling out of the toilet. It took a minute for my brain to process what I was seeing.

He freaked out! I was rushing him to the emergency clinic but the local news stations were blowing up our phones trying to film him getting treated. I think he was in a state of shock so we went somewhere where he could walk it off and figure out what happened.

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Christopher continued:

Luckily his sister is a urologist and told him how to self medicate the bite. When we got back to his place, Spanish TV was waiting for us.

He seemed amused at first – I think because of the shock – but what’s interesting is that Gio lately is acting super freaked-out by toilets. I don’t think he finds it funny anymore, and I don’t blame him!

Now I look twice – sometimes three times – before I go too. I think he might be developing a phobia, and now he’s telling people he’s constantly worried about something crawling out of the toilet again and biting him. Oh, and he’s been having nightmares about it.

Here is Gio’s illustration of the terrifying attack…

People have said it probably got there after someone flushed a baby iguana down the toilet and it grew.

Strangely though, this is the second surprise iguana attack in a toilet this month in Florida. That’s two too many.

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Now, in the aftermath of Iguanagate, Gio is going through all the stages of trauma, having now reached enlightenment and is trying to help others who have gone through the same.

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Christopher, after just getting off the phone to Gio, told us:

He’s getting stared at everywhere he goes now. At the gym he said everybody came up to him telling their own secret ‘when animals attacked’ stories.

He said a lot of people are like: ‘I’ve never told anybody this, but…’ and he’s become like a guru advising some of the people on how to recover from an attack. Now he’s like: ‘If I can help other people heal from their animal attacks, maybe I can heal from mine’.

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Inspiring stuff.

And what of the iguana? It’s still terrorising the streets and balls of Hialeah.