Man Sets Strict Set Of Rules For Girlfriend While Watching Avengers: Endgame

Marvel Studios/KamillahRose/Twitter

Some people take films very seriously.

And as one of the most epic film franchises finally reaches its conclusion (for now), some fans are treating their cinematic experience as much, much more than just a regular trip to the movies.

On the one hand it’s fair enough – there have been numerous films leading up to Avengers: Endgame, all of which are expected to be tied off neatly in the final film, so there’s presumably a lot of information and a lot to be concentrated on.

On the other hand – and I’m playing devil’s avocado here – it’s just a superhero film (don’t @ me), so how serious can it be?

One guy thought it’d be wise to give his girlfriend a few rules to abide by while they go to the cinema to see said film. He’s a serious one.

His girlfriend, Kamilla, decided to post the rules on Twitter, writing:

My boyfriend sent me a very sternly worded note about our cinema trip to see #AvangersEndgame tomorrow. Mad because I thought it was just date night

And the rules:

Regarding your attendance at the Avengers End Game tomorrow with myself, please see below confirmation of the following:

We will not be queuing to buy popcorn, please make prior arrangements.

You are not permitted to consume any food during the film (inc end credits) – you may quietly drink water.

I will not be moving to allow you to pass for a toilet break – find an alternative route.

You will not communicate with me during the trailers or the duration of the film (inc end credits)

In case of an emergency relating to our son, I give you full authority to leave and take control – I’ll join you after the film (inc end credits)

After the film (inc end credits) we will have a 30min debrief session to discuss the events, followed by a period of quiet personal reflection.

It is acknowledged that I may not be my usual self post this film. Please do not be alarmed.

Thank you for your cooperation, I look forward to a pleasurable viewing experience.

Kind Regards,

Cyrille

They may or may not be real rules, perhaps they were written half-jokingly, half-seriously, like these ones.

Either way, it’s going to be an intense cinema experience.

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Charlie Cocksedge

Charlie Cocksedge is a journalist and sub-editor at UNILAD. He graduated from the University of Manchester with an MA in Creative Writing, where he learnt how to write in the third person, before getting his NCTJ. His work has also appeared in such places as The Guardian, PN Review and the bin.