We’ve all eaten some shitty junk food in our time, but one poor bloke on Reddit made it even more literal while bingeing on snacks at his mate’s house.
The Redditor had just moved back to his home town and was staying at a hostel, so he was spending a good amount of time at his friends place.
They’d gone to the shop and stocked up on junk food with the intention of it lasting for around a week.
That night they finished off a jumbo bag of crisps and decided they wanted a few more so they popped open another bag, had a few, and put the bag on the table to save the rest for the next day.
Our Redditor wandered back to his hostel and the next day made his way back over to his mate’s place to hang out until his friend finished work.
After a while of sitting there, watching TV, he noticed that there were significantly less crisps in the bag than the night before.
He said:
Thinking little of it, I grabbed a Dr. Pepper and proceeded to go at the rest of the bag like a mongrel dog, shoving several large mouthfuls into my gullet as if I hadn’t eaten in a week.
When the bag began to run low he tipped it upside down and poured the remains into his mouth, stopping briefly to notice a funny taste, before washing down the mushy paste with his Dr. Pepper.
When his friend came home the Redditor began to give his mate a hard time for eating the crisps. However his friend looked at him strangely and said: “I didn’t eat them. They were being eaten while I was in bed.”
Confused, the Redditor asked if his friend’s brother had eaten them. Unfortunately, he hadn’t.
It was then they had a moment of clarity and remembered that the day before his friend had mentioned that he’d been trying to kill a rat that had moved into the house.
Then our Redditor remembered the funny taste… Dear God!
He claims this was the first (non-drunk) time that he ever stuck his fingers down his throat to make himself vomit and still feels ‘a tad queasy’ thinking about his shitty snack.
Reddit didn’t react sympathetically.
Let this be a lesson to you all – always check your snacks for rat shit!
More of a concept than a journalist, Tom Percival was forged in the bowels of Salford University from which he emerged grasping a Masters in journalism.
Since then his rise has been described by himself as ‘meteoric’ rising to the esteemed rank of Social Editor at UNILAD as well as working at the BBC, Manchester Evening News, and ITV.
He credits his success to three core techniques, name repetition, personality mirroring, and never breaking off a handshake.