Man Stranded On Fountain After Taking Ton Of MDMA And Stealing Swan Boat

By :
WFTV9/ABC

A man had to be rescued by police after he took an excessive amount of MDMA, stole a boat and became stranded in the middle of a lake.

If you ever need a reason not to do drugs – 36-year-old Keith Thurston’s story could be the cautionary tale you so desperately need?

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Thurston’s drug-fuelled escapade began after he took ‘a large quantity of Molly’, according to Florida police reports, he then proceeded to steal a swan boat and ended up being marooned on Lake Eola:

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When police apprehended Thurston he told them he ‘wanted to go be with the swans because they don’t judge him’, report Buzzfeed.

I think it’s fair to say drugs can make you do some questionable things because Thruston was found just before 4 am, screaming while sitting on the fountain.

He told police he took the swan boat to paddle up to the fountain and afterwards, decided he wanted to get out and walk in the fancy lake fixture.

Again, no real reason was offered up as to why – I can only direct you back to the fact he’d digested copious amounts of Molly.

The problems began when he forgot to tie the boat securely and the current floated it away from him.

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To be honest, when you’re off your head and on a binge, checking to see if your swan boat is properly secure, is one of the last things you’d have on your mind!

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Actually, I’m pretty sure there was nothing going on in Thruston’s mind other than ‘where are the swans?’

Orlando’s Fire Department was called to the scene of the crime to rescue him from his ecstasy-addled predicament and was later transported to Florida South Hospital for treatment – he was visibly wet and shivverring when he was rescued, report WFTV.

Of course, the Florida PD can’t let Thurston walk away unpunished for his antics and he’s waiting to see what charges will be dished out to him.

Seems like life with the swans is sounding better by the minute!