Don’t Panic But Beyoncé Has Kidnapped Sia, Apparently

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There’s a completely believable conspiracy theory going around on social media that Beyoncé has kidnapped Sia and is holding her hostage in an underground lair, forcing her to write songs.

If you needed another reminder that the Internet is an insane place, this is it.

Apparently, people over in Brazil believe that Sia isn’t actually out and about living her life, she’s actually in captivity, after being kidnapped by Beyoncé.

The theory goes that Beyoncé kidnapped Sia quite a while ago and is currently keeping her in a subterranean lair, where she’s being forced to write songs for Bey, Buzzfeed reports.

The theory has even created the hashtag #SaveSia, which people are using to share ‘evidence’ of Sia’s kidnapping.

People have been tweeting ‘clues’ – ranging from supposed coded messages in Sia’s tweets to ‘texts’ from Beyoncé’s to Jay Z – that show Sia is desperate to tell the world she needs help and can’t escape Queen B.

Someone even laid the whole thing out on YouTube with Sims, which is definitely an interesting watch:

How did this whole thing get started? I have absolutely no idea. But it possibly could have begun with a Billboard article from 2015.

In the article, Sia describes working with Beyoncé as a ‘writing camp’:

Not true of artists like Beyonce, with whom Sia says collaborating is “like a writing camp” and that “she’s very Frankenstein when she comes to the songs,” taking bits and pieces from various songwriters and asking to hear them mixed together. “In the end, she had maybe 25 songs of mine on hold, and I was very excited to get a couple of them back. Definitely one is on the album.”

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This has somehow spiraled into Brazilian Sia fans creating the theory that Beyoncé kidnapped Sia and is keeping her in a ‘cativeiro’ – a Brazilian word for a specific place where you keep people who have been kidnapped.

It’s all very confusing and fake, but it’s probably just further proof that Queen B is part of the Illuminati.

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