Princess Beatrice ‘Nearly Blinded’ Ed Sheeran With Sword In Bizarre Incident

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When the Royal Family aren’t busy being a living tourist attraction or trying to boost their tax paying money pot to buy some new furniture for Buckingham Palace just what do they get up to?

If this anecdote is anything to go by, they get up to some bizarre shit, according to the Mirror.

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Ed Sheeran has been out of the limelight for quite some time now so chances are you didn’t notice the scar he’s got festered on his cheek.

But just how did he get it?

Well apparently at a lavish Royal Party, which I imagine is like a Gatsby party with even more falsity, Princess Beatrice was pretending to knight James Blunt.

With a ceremonial sword clasped between the royal fingers she is reported to have roared ‘Arise Sir James’ before swinging the sword over her shoulder with some force and completely obliterating an unsuspecting Ed Sheeran stood directly behind her, slashing his face open.

Man I just love knowing that my taxes go towards funding this old school classic form of Royal tomfoolery.

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Apparently Ed was actually rushed to hospital as a result of the nip but in all honesty it doesn’t look that bad.

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The party is thought to have took place earlier this month at the Royal Lodge in Windsor, home to the Duke of York – yep, I’ve no idea who that sponger is either.

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One source said of the incident:

[Ed] could have been blinded. Beatrice was deeply upset and inconsolable.

Poor Beatrice. I sure hope she’s in a better place right now.