Idris Elba was recently voted the sexiest man alive, and very well deserved indeed may I say.
However, his enigmatically handsome good looks are not reflected in a new doll/intruder bearing the sexy one’s name.
With arched eyebrows and a shiny bald head, this doll looks more like a Bond villain than the man widely hoped to be the next Bond himself.
The doll has distinctive pixie ears and long gangly legs. It does not have Elba’s broad shoulders, penetrating brown eyes or masculine jawline.
In short, I would not trust this doll to go about solving gruesome murders in London, unorthodox genius or not…
Now, I am no Gepetto, but we are quickly nearing the beginning of the year 2019.
We no longer have to rely on the town crier to tell tales about the rakish good looks of the rich and famous.
Nor are we puzzling together an image of Elba from ye olde ballads and castle tapestries.
Anyone with access to the internet will have a very clear idea of what the 46-year-old actor – and his perfectly full head of hair – looks like.
So what on earth went wrong? And who were the doll makers actually basing this on?
Some have likened the doll to villainous Jafar from Aladdin, while someone else spotted a resemblance to Yul Brynner in the King and I.
It appears Elba is as perplexed by the doll as the rest of us, tweeting a picture of American TV personality Montel Williams in an apparent nod to the striking similarities noted by fans.
The doll apparently costs $1,100 by the way, so it’s probably not intended for your kid’s stocking.
As ever, I am left hopelessly perplexed by the desire of adults who want to flush away a month’s pay on a doll. But if this is your thing, then I imagine realism is key to this experience..
If you want to save some money – and get a better likeness – maybe just nip down to hobby craft, fill your trolly with a load of papier mâché and go nuts while watching The Wire.
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Tim Horner is a sub-editor at UNILAD. He graduated with a BA Journalism from University College Falmouth before most his colleagues were born. A previous editor of adult mags, he now enjoys bringing the tone down in the viral news sector.