No. Nope. Just stop. I haven’t even gotten round to finishing Dark Souls 3 yet and already some kind of supernatural being has beat the game like this?
I couldn’t comprehend beating Dark Souls 3 without dodging, or without leveling up, or without blocking and parrying – yet some guy has managed to beat the game without any of the above.
Twitch streamer TolomeoR is responsible for this madness, and as I see it, he’s either a Jedi, or has spider sense. It’s definitely one of those two.
The feat took him between 50-60 hours, a quarter of which he claims was taken up by one boss – Soul of Cinder apparently took him 15 hours to beat. God, what a noob, right?
You can find a playlist of his boss battles right here, minus the attempts he fucked up of course, because no one really wants to see how the sausage gets made, so to speak.
Tolomeo started out clinging to the standard broadsword, which he used up until Champion Gundyr. At that point he got hold of Astora’s Straight Sword, with the help of the Priestess Ring.
Additionally, he used the Cloranthy, Flynn’s, and Lloyd’s Sword rings to help him throughout his run. You can take a look at one of the more impressive battles below.
So I’m just heading out to the garden to burn my copy of Dark Souls 3, because this guys has made me feel like NOTHING.
Ewan Moore is a journalist at UNILAD Gaming who still quite hasn’t gotten out of his mid 00’s emo phase. After graduating from the University of Portsmouth in 2015 with a BA in Journalism & Media Studies (thanks for asking), he went on to do some freelance words for various places, including Kotaku, Den of Geek, and TheSixthAxis, before landing a full time gig at UNILAD in 2016.