In space, nobody can hear you scream… with laughter at bizarrely misguided uniform choices that is.
Famously, there isn’t a mad amount of woodland and shrubbery in space. And if human beings were to ever find even the tiddliest traces of tree on Mars, it would most likely make headline news worldwide.
But should they ever have hide from extra-terrestrial life in the bushes, the United States Space Force has got it covered.
To the delight of anyone with a funny bone, the United States Space Force has revealed its very first ‘Space Force utility uniforms’, with the outfits having apparently just touched down in the Pentagon.
Now I’m no Sigourney Weaver, but I would have said the best way to keep a low profile in alien territory would be to wear uniforms which blend seamlessly into, erm, space.
For example, perhaps a pitch black jumpsuit patterned with those glow in the dark stars you used to stick to your bedroom ceiling as a kid. Or a boiler suit with the same luminous, crater punctured pattern of the moon.
However, as demonstrated in a tweet by the United States Space Force, it would appear their officers will be donned head to toe in earthy camouflage. And their Twitter followers have been left thoroughly tickled.
Many people have put forward their own superior suggestions as to what this uniform should look like, from wizard costumes to rocket ship patterned babygrows.
One sensible person tweeted:
#SpaceForce uniforms should be no gloss black. That way when you’re lost in space, you’ll be harder to find.
If someone is shooting at you … harder to see.
Another pondered:
Since when is space camouflage colour? Shouldn’t the uniforms be black with sequins scattered on them so they twinkle?
Responding to the criticism, The United States Space Force explained the odd design choice was actually down to cost-cutting measures:
USSF is utilizing current Army/Air Force uniforms, saving costs of designing/producing a new one.
Members will look like their joint counterparts they’ll be working with, on the ground.
However, clearing up this misunderstanding has done little to stop the sniggers.
The United States Space Force was launched in December, and marks America’s first new military service in seven decades.
As reported by the Independent, US president Donald Trump put aside $40m [£31m] for this new service, which will reportedly come under the jurisdiction of the US air force.
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Jules studied English Literature with Creative Writing at Lancaster University before earning her masters in International Relations at Leiden University in The Netherlands (Hoi!). She then trained as a journalist through News Associates in Manchester. Jules has previously worked as a mental health blogger, copywriter and freelancer for various publications.