The iPhone 8 has landed, and while the tech sheeple have flocked to test out its new updates, the rest of us can’t help but snigger at the ridiculousness of it all.
Apple, every now and then, drop a new iPhone and inevitably, the release eclipses everything else for a few days, playing into the perpetual millennial reliance on commodification and capitalism.
Only this time, it has Face ID.
As George Orwell turns in his grave, what better way to lighten the mood than a few well placed funny tweets about Apple’s latest clever and totally pointless piece of facial recognition tech.
First, we have the man, the myth, the unseeable legend, John Cena:
It wouldn’t be a news story unless Frankie Boyle waded in with a cum joke:
Now, here comes the Game of Thrones fan theories:
The Beyhive couldn’t believe the luck of one iPhone:
Some mild banter from Ronald Isley here:
And then there were the Doomsday Robot Uprising jokes, of course:
All jokes aside, the iPhone does seem to be, as the straight-talking tech heads would say, a ‘nifty piece of kit’, featuring an all-glass casing, A11 Bionic processor, a dual-lens camera setup which pairs a 12-megapixel rear lens with a telephoto lens in the iPhone 8 Plus.
Apple said the iPhone 8 would go up for pre-order on September 15, ahead of a final release date of September 22.
It costs £699 SIM-free for the 64GB version, rising to £849 for the 256GB variant.
For the 64 GB iPhone 8 Plus you’ll have to fork out £799, and the 256GB model going for a whopping £949 off-contract.
All those features and still no headphone jack… Android 4eva.
A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you’ve never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.