Twenty years on from the heroin-fueled cult classic, Renton and the boys are back for Danny Boyle’s T2: Trainspotting, and apparently no longer addicted to smack.
The iconic ‘choose life’ monologue that angsty students have been scribbling on their walls in black lipstick since 1996 has had a modern update.
The trailer for the new film, which features original Trainspotting novelist Irvine Welsh in the role of Mikey Forrester, doesn’t fail us with it’s nostalgic soundtrack, with Underworld’s Born Slippy playing in the background.
Renton may have put down needle, but do not fear, T2 still features numerous dubious substances, nudity from his ‘old flames’ and an updated version of the ‘choose life’ sermon with references to Facebook and Instagram.
You’re going to have scratch the old one off the wall now and replace it with this:
Choose life
Choose Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and hope that someone, somewhere cares
Choose looking up old flames, wishing you’d done it all differently
And choose watching history repeat itself
Choose your future
Choose reality TV, slut shaming, revenge porn
Choose a zero hour contract, a two hour journey to work
And choose the same for your kids, only worse, and smother the pain with an unknown dose of an unknown drug made in somebody’s kitchen
And then… take a deep breath
You’re an addict, so be addicted
Just be addicted to something else
Choose the ones you love
Choose your future
Choose life
Gone are the mortgage repayments and CD players, because no one can afford either of those anymore.
For nostalgia’s sake, here’s the original speech:
Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin can openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed-interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life . . . But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life: I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you’ve got heroin?
The original film smashed box offices in 1996, raking in £4.7 million in its opening weekend.
T2, starring Ewan McGregor, Robert Carlyle, Jonny Lee Miller, and Ewen Bremner, is set for release on January 27, 2017.
