‘Tis the season to have a beard, apparently, as facial fuzz keeps its proud owners warm and those around them free from festive stress.
This time of year, as temperatures drop, it’s sometimes hard to tell whether the lucky men who can grown facial fuzz have done so for warmth or in aid of following trends.
Either way, the decision could literally pay off, as those with bare faces look on with both financial and fashion envy.
A grooming brand is recruiting bearded men nationwide, and offering to pay them a tidy sum for a rather unique job.
For £30 an hour, the role would require you to leave your personal space at the door, and offer your services at a ‘beard stroking’ pop-up for stressed-out shoppers.
Mo Bro’s are looking for a select few special candidates, and they’re trying to recruit you for their ‘beard therapy’ innovation, if you’ve got the stubble (and then some).
It’s been reported in the medical journal Frontiers of Psychology that ‘warm touches’ between humans release oxytocin, the hormone that reduces the levels of the stress hormone, cortisol – as does stroking cat fur. Other benefits of stroking fur include a low heart rate and blood pressure.
Mo Bro’s, one of the leading beard grooming companies in the UK, reckon the same applies to human men’s beards, and are hoping to offer stressed-out shoppers the ideal solution.
All candidates must have a beard that’s at least two inches long and the company are also looking for anyone with a Santa-like beard. The pop-up will be open for three days from December 20 at Highcross shopping centre in Leicester.
Savan Dattani, co-founder of Mo Bro’s, said:
Christmas is a stressful time of year for most people. You’re in a mad rush trying to buy presents, food and drink, whilst juggling work, a family and other commitments.
We had a think of how we could make this situation more enjoyable, and it suddenly came to us – a beard stroking station!
We have a few guys with fantastic beards already signed up, but we could do with a few more because we anticipate demand to be high. Santa beards preferred, but not essential!
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He adds:
It’s fairly common knowledge that stroking soft things, like animals, reduces stress, but we didn’t want to enlist the help of animals because they obviously can be somewhat unpredictable and chaotic! So, doing what we do, we thought beards are the next best thing!
We’ll have an array of products available to use, so the beards will be soft and will smell great. Guests of the station can even brush them if they like!
The beard stroking station will welcome both men and women, who’d like to take a seat and stroke something soft, during the often-stressful Christmas shopping period. Strokers will have to register their interest in a slot beforehand.
Prices will cost £5 per 5 minutes, if you’re after a chance to stroke a stranger, and all profits made will be donated to homeless charity Shelter. You can book a session online.
Apply to prostitute out your majestic beard online here.
A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you’ve never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.