Drinking and tattoos are the greatest thing in the world so long as you never, ever look at them again.
Let me explain. A few years ago, me and the fellas went to Malia. A proper jobby; bagged an all-inclusive deal at the Creta Verano and everything.
Not the greatest views or food, but who cares about Kokoretsi when there’s drinking to be done and beaches to vomit on.
Come the second night, having been inhaling Mythos since 10am, one of the fellas turned to me and said, ‘Oi Tealy, how’s about you go and get a tattoo. You don’t have one do ya?’
I yelled back, ‘Leave it out, Princey!’ and laughed to myself. It was all classic, harmless banter.
Then I turned around and said, ‘I’ll get some ink done and you pay for my drinks tomorrow!’ Princey howled at me and then said, ‘Abso-f***ing-lutely!’
So there we were, at Wizard Tattoo Stalis. ‘Surprise me, fam’ I said to Juris, the only tattooist on the job at the time. ‘What?’ he asked. ‘Tattoo, on my leg. Capische?’
It was insensitive and churlish of me to be so abrasive with Juris, but I was leathered. Half-an-hour later we were done. ‘Oh my f***ing days’ Princey laughed. ‘Mate, have a look at that.’
‘No way,’ I said. ‘Not now. Not ever. How much is that Juris? Cough up Princey!’
To this day I haven’t looked at the tattoo, and thus cannot provide you with photographic evidence. Sorry!
Someone who has and continues to look at his boozed-up permanent etching, however, is Malakye Brooks, who last year got his girlfriend’s face (and chest) inked on his back while on the p*ss in Ibiza.
This was the result:
As far as drunk tatts go it’s not terrible is it? The sentiment is nice, I suppose, even if it’s #explicit and #raunchy.
He explained to LADbible:
It was a typical holiday, and my girlfriend was out there with her mates.We met up one night and decided to get a tattoo. I didn’t know what I wanted as it was one of those spur of the moment things. So, we got a picture with her face and handed it to the tattoo artist. She paid Euro 500 (£442) for the tattoo, too. I sat there for four hours getting butchered!
Four hours for a pretty decent portrait. Worth it IMHO. I’m not so sure why the couple didn’t make it into 2018.
Apparently Malakye is trying to get himself a place on Tattoo Fixers to get rid of the thing.
I reckon he should keep it. Sometimes in life we make mistakes. Malakye’s was that he looked at it in the first place.
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