Although it’s hard to imagine, celebrities weren’t always put together adults with money, fame and success.
Once they too were gawky teenagers just trying to make it through high school, like you and I.
But what were they like as high school kids? This Twitter feed has asked the big question and come up with hundreds of answers with varying degrees of hilarity.
– 4.0 GPA
– everyone's sugar daddy
– needs to feel loved
– emotional
– loyal
– cried at graduation pic.twitter.com/jYn2PDwo1w— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) August 27, 2016
-drama club vice president
-salutatorian
-fuckboy
-falls in love fast
-never won an award in his high school career pic.twitter.com/Yzu1YV8Qpi— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) July 12, 2016
-Everyone's friend
-doesn't play any sports
-Class clown and prom king
-dating the most beautiful girl in school pic.twitter.com/pwaLfdSE29— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) July 9, 2016
-cheer captain
-writes essays on the illuminati
-if anyone says anything against her they're immediately the schools most hated person pic.twitter.com/N95hf2Foo4— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) October 18, 2016
-in choir
-stalks her ex
-leaves love notes on her exes car
-caught crying over her ex in the bathroom on occasion pic.twitter.com/7vV7Tb2afe— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 6, 2016
-drinks one beer and turns bi
-everyone talks about her titties
-parties hard Saturday, but seen on church Sundays pic.twitter.com/MVp4Ra292e— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 24, 2016
-president of the LGBTQ club
-frees the nipples
-randomly makes weird cat noises
-skips class to do her make up pic.twitter.com/JgbqPiXlJJ— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 21, 2016
-lunch lady
-always caught up on school gossip
– better at counseling than the counsellors
-gives everyone seconds pic.twitter.com/86DqDdk1DZ— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 19, 2016
-first one awake @ sleepovers
-doesn't change til everyone leaves the locker room
-mommas boy
-on the wrestling team pic.twitter.com/05IUlBInNI— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 13, 2016
-buys 30 dollar grams
-cried at the end of "of mice and men"
-tells his black friends he wants a neck tattoo
-wears his brothers clothes pic.twitter.com/QiiOdJB9Ey— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) November 3, 2016
-had a beard since middle school
-thinks he's class clown but annoying af
-prolly doesn't wipe his ass
-has child development as an elective pic.twitter.com/fkI9I8MfYN— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) October 9, 2016
-that one couple who gets mistaken as brother & sister
-no one thought they'd date
-also starred in a musical together. pic.twitter.com/XOx9KHkKb8— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) October 3, 2016
-Always smiling
-Fastest kid in the world
-Never looks like he's trying but always wins
-Has the best celebrations pic.twitter.com/GXU2APUsmW— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) September 4, 2016
-plays ultimate frisbee
-suspended for vaping in bathroom
-works at little Caesars
-wears mandals to school pic.twitter.com/SKLzGdziim— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 5, 2016
-corny dude
-tries being funny in class but everyone tells him to stfu
-reason class stays late 5 min after the bell pic.twitter.com/lszYARY3Sw— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 4, 2016
The Twitter feed shows no mercy, regardless of status and success.
Not even Michael Cera, who played a virile young high school boy in Juno is safe.
– eats free school breakfast
– good friends with the janitor
– runs everywhere he goes
– quotes anime pic.twitter.com/zrP9YD3GhY— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) November 28, 2016
It covers all manner of high school cliques, from the jocks to the cheer squad by way of the thespians, AV club and debate team.
-runs the robotics team
-in charge of student government
-pronounces students names wrong
-banging John Connor's mom pic.twitter.com/9DvLIZN3xO— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) November 28, 2016
Then there are those bromances that last far beyond your high school days.
-best friends since birth
-have the best weed in school
-throws the best parties
-lowkey in love with each other pic.twitter.com/6AUYvi6FV7— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) September 25, 2016
Don’t forget the punk cliques either.
The tweets are wildly popular and receive thousands of retweets and likes from their followers.
-always wears black
-only girl in the crew
-"its not just a phase dad!"
-smells like cigs
-in love w/ the sk8er boi pic.twitter.com/9iHb3DMw2Q— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) June 30, 2016
…Although, sometimes the humour is very close to the nose.
For example, their take on Margot Robbie does appear to be the private fantasy of the tweeter rather than any reflection on her career or public persona.
-daddy's girl
-gets her way or else…
-in a toxic relationship
-talks about getting choked during sex
-RT's sexual GIFS pic.twitter.com/NFVBu4jk8X— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) November 11, 2016
While the feed is an oblique satire, their take on Britney’s Britney and her high school sex life is rather unsavoury too.
Brittany
-30 year old boyfriend
-suck dick behind bleachers
-Fucked the gym teacher
-pussy smells like vinegar pic.twitter.com/bUXEuF8xYI— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) September 12, 2016
…I actually think the People’s Champ would be a wonderful teacher – and President.
-wrestling coach
-history teacher
-banging the art teacher and the cheer coach
-don't do shit in his class pic.twitter.com/gzZ1J609C5— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) November 7, 2016
Perhaps even better than Frank Ocean or Ellen DeGeneres.
Frank Ocean
-English teacher
-All the students love him
-Promise the class he's gonna post grades soon, NEVER DOES pic.twitter.com/lBWXdfS95j— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) September 8, 2016
-media teacher
-dances randomly during lessons
-sponsor for the LGBTQ club
-everyones favorite teacher pic.twitter.com/4eBE2YBtrL— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) July 24, 2016
The Situation got back on track though with this appraisal of Jersey Shore‘s Mike Sorrentino.
-try's to fuck everyone's gf
-does ecstasy before every school dance
-that one jackass who doesn't play sports but always with the jocks pic.twitter.com/V1fQQHrjaA— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) November 4, 2016
At times the feed gets topical. During the Presidential election, they took the opportunity to weigh in on Trump..
-Class President
-Wants separate wings for each grade
-Rich Kid but nobody likes him
-Grabs Girls by the pussy
-makes fun of retarded kids pic.twitter.com/HWEF79Deq3— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) October 12, 2016
…And of course, in the interests of democracy, Hillary got a fictional throwback too.
-"That" grandma
-Is lowkey rich
-Deletes emails
-Sees/hears everything
-Goes to bed at 6:45 P.M. pic.twitter.com/eJqGXCIWFv— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) September 28, 2016
Not even the President-Elect’s son and wife are free from this feed’s playground bullying.
-"my dad will sue you" ass hat
– wants to make the purge real
– smells like chicken salad
– expelled for taking a shit in the bathroom sink pic.twitter.com/pX25FfzbSG— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) October 30, 2016
-Teacher
-married a sugar daddy in college
-No one understands wtf she says
-steals lesson plans from other teachers pic.twitter.com/eSsF942FPj— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) August 10, 2016
The topical political debate continues with an appearance from Ken Bone, among other viral superstars of this year.
-in student council
-gets bitches
-has his dick out for Harambe
-fuck with him and get your ass beat
-best sweater since Mr. Rogers pic.twitter.com/RFC9ZJvxuV— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) October 11, 2016
-Class President
-ran a bible study during lunch
-ppl cheated off him but got in trouble
-got expelled for no reason pic.twitter.com/kJkouCjIZr— If Celebs Were in HS (@CelebsInHS) August 9, 2016
And what would a 2016 Twitter feed be without the internets favourite deceased gorilla, Harambe?
If nothing else, this feed is a welcome reminder that we’re all just trying to escape adulthood, one personality flaw at a time.
A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you’ve never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.