There’s no better way to celebrate Valentine’s Day than biting down on your partner’s sweet ballsack.
If there’s one surefire way to your loved one’s heart, it’s not presents or flowers: it’s quality food.
Take a leaf out of Emma Plummer’s book: as a self-taught baker from Tucson, Arizona, she looked at creating some gorgeous heart-shaped macarons in preparation for February 14 – alas, it turned out to be quite a testy experience.
As the gastronomical maestro behind Butter and Whisk, Plummer’s often pretty and always delicious sweet treats (especially macarons) can be seen across her Instagram page.
Unfortunately, her attempt at heart-shaped bakes went hilariously wrong – less romantic, but certainly more memorable.
Plummer, 23, told BuzzFeed News:
I had my batter and I was following the template, but I didn’t really know what I was doing. I was like: ‘Wow, these are not looking that great.’
While she was unsure of the batter at first, she marched on with the baking, hoping the end results would be less testicle-esque. However, their evolution to sugary gonads progressed quickly in the oven, with their pink colour turning to a colour closer to flesh – all that’s missing is some pubes.
Plummer added:
They were just heart-shaped fails, I laughed hysterically and I sent them to our family group chat and everybody was dying over them.
She posted the snap on Twitter, writing: ‘I tried to make hearts and they turned out like ballsacks.’ The tweet soon went viral, amassing nearly 185,000 likes and more than 42,000 retweets.
Some people responded with the best puns – ‘Sackarons,’ one person replied – while others chimed in with praise for the sugary cojones. One person wrote: ‘I think you stumbled onto something here. Make a batch for the next pride march,’ with another adding: ‘Or testicular cancer awareness month.’
Commenting on the online reaction, Plummer said:
One of the people that I follow responded to it and I opened it and noticed there was a ton of likes and retweets. It was crazy! I didn’t think they would go over as well as they did.
It appears people are rather interested in buying Plummer’s plums. One person wrote: ‘Market it to bachelorette parties and you’ll be set for life.’
It also inspired others to share their anatomy-based baking anomalies (unsurprisingly, there’s some penis-shaped bakes to accompany the balls).
To me, why would you want macarons shaped like hearts instead of testicles? That’s just diabollockal.
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After graduating from Glasgow Caledonian University with an NCTJ and BCTJ-accredited Multimedia Journalism degree, Cameron ventured into the world of print journalism at The National, while also working as a freelance film journalist on the side, becoming an accredited Rotten Tomatoes critic in the process. He’s now left his Scottish homelands and took up residence at UNILAD as a journalist.